Red Sonja

by Mike McGranaghan

The original Brigitte Nielsen-starring Red Sonja came out all the way back in 1985. Since then, multiple filmmakers have tried unsuccessfully to make a follow-up, including Robert Rodriguez and Bryan Singer. Forty years later, director M.J. Bassett has succeeded where other, more well-known Hollywood entities have not. And the kicker is that the new Red Sonja was not even remotely worth the wait.

The first 40 minutes of the movie are a total slog. They stiffly set up the cliched idea that there’s an evil ruler, Dragan (Robert Sheehan), who has been ruthlessly taking over villages. Warrior Sonja (Matilda Lutz) crosses him and ends up enslaved, forced to participate in deadly gladiator-type games. During this first act, the stock characters, including Dragan’s nefarious bride Annisia (Wallis Day), engage in endless conversations designed to dump large amounts of exposition. Clunkily written dialogue ensures you won’t care about any of it – assuming you can follow what’s going on.

Once the games start, Red Sonja perks up slightly. It doesn’t become good, it just becomes goofy. Sonja puts on a chain mail bikini and fights a cyclops, among other things. Giant scorpions are introduced, too, only to be quickly forgotten. The upshot is that Sonja joins forces with other oppressed people to halt Dragan’s reign. Everything plays out in the most routine Braveheart-esque way imaginable.

I used the word “goofy.” It’s true that the source material has a touch of goofiness embedded in its DNA. But there are two types of goofy: good goofy and bad goofy. Red Sonja is the latter. Bad goofy films don’t realize they’re goofy, which is precisely the pitfall here. Bassett and screenwriter Tasha Huo are taking the story seriously. They’re trying to create an action-packed epic that can spawn sequels. As a result, you sometimes chuckle at the movie when it’s not trying to be funny.

Especially disappointing is that the material lets down Matilda Lutz. The actress, perhaps best known for Coralie Fargeat’s 2017 thriller Revenge, isn’t a bad choice to play the lead role. She brings fierceness to Sonja. Being saddled with dumb dialogue and a meandering story minimizes the potential impact of her performance. She’s surrounded by unmemorable supporting players, as well.

I admit that there are individual moments where the bad goofiness of Red Sonja is mildly amusing. Again, a woman in a chain mail bikini fights a cyclops. Those moments are few and far between. For the most part, it’s difficult to focus on anything other than the wasted potential on display.

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